Run #1672 Pop Went His Cherry
Sir Flaccid Of Nuttingham sacrificed his virginity to the Gypsies by setting a trail from the parking lot at McLaren Lodge between Fell and Hayes in Golden Gate Park. SFON is likely far from the first to lose his virginity or any other valuable there! The Outbeer arrived packing its precious cargo of Lagunitas Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’ and the Gypsies’ own 3 Stooges, Adopt A Pussy, Backside Banger and Pied Piper soon appeared to wage another bitch slapping battle over who would plunge the tap into the keg. AAP admitted he didn’t know why he cared since Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’ is less beer than laxative in his case! The big guns, Cuming Mutha, Who’s Your Daddy and Pastel Gazelle were chomping at the bit assuming our hare would be desperate to both, not embarrass himself and lay a trail whose praises they would sing. Pastel Gazelle could barely keep Just Bandit from chomping through his leash! Magnum, Not I was just looking forward to a virgin hare getting him lost! The Whine And Chowder Society’s own Mary Tyler Whore tossed her cap into the air and tossed 50MM Fetish and Bitch, Moan AND Whine from Ohio into the Gypsies’ sewer! Feeling a need to cleanse his soul, 50MM Fetish fairly begged to lead the Gypsies’ religious service so taking the Family Missal in hand he provided sermon on family love that brought our hare to his knees where he fairly wept with joy! Once SFON was able to control his tears he sent the pack off to claim his virginity. The Lost Patrol was off with its usual cast of halt, lame and already drunk characters. Trail left the parking lot and dropped into the woods before crossing Conservatory Dr. E. The woods were exited at Peacock Meadow where Jack The Ripper was spotted preening for some teen Tik Tokkers. AAP was quick to tell the young ladies that he was JTR’s attorney and the preening would be addressed by JTR’s therapist. Trail led into Pompei Circle, but the only volcanic activity was Tongueless sending gouts of fetid gas into the air! Between the Dahlia Garden, Fuchsia Dell and Oaklands Natural Area, Cuming Mutha wondered if our hare’s hobby was gardening not flogging his body with exercise. Trail eventually exited the park at Stanyan St., and the pack was back to pounding concrete. Eventually the pack was all back together except of course Hand Pump and Bitch Pimp who were making sure that every step of the trail was trod. The keg was brought into play neath the Cloak Of Invisibility and the Sacred Thermi filled with Rum Hot Toddys joined the Vitamin J on top. No sooner was the tap back in the keg than Cheese Turd rolled in to drain as much of all the alcohol as he could. Pastel Gazelle arrived even wetter than usual and praised the hare. M, NI was more than thrilled at how lost he’d been. Who’s Your Daddy pronounced the trail as justifying the consumption of vast amounts of alcohol. E=MC Fucked was tossing back pints as he allowed, he’d cum mainly to see SFON bleed out his virginity! Taking up the Sword Of Power,T convened the Circle and embarrassed the visitors who did a grand job making T look even more useless than usual. Our hare was brought forward and serenaded for his efforts. Eventually Fits In dragged T off stage and the praise she received was indeed fulsome. Cheers.
On In!